Self-Sabotage Discussion @inlpcenter

self sabotage discussion

iNLP Center NLP and life coaching trainers got together to discuss self-sabotage, beginning with the strange tendency we all have to seek negativity.

Seeking – Negativity – Discussion 

iNLP Center trainers discuss the tendency to seek negativity and pain.

In this episode:

  • Diagnosing where the problems lie and unconscious self-sabotage exists
  • Looking for how someone is setting themselves up and how they are seeking it
  • Filtering out who is going to apply
  • Ecology concerns
  • Unlocking the unconsciousness
  • The freedom that comes from owning your stuff

Shadow Coaching:

  • Opting out and why you are opting out
  • How do you act in the moment?
    • Acting on autopilot
  • What’s absurd about this whole thing?
  • What are you unconsciously seeking?
    • Unconsciously seeking a result
  • What negative painful thing are you seeking?
    • Rejection and anticipating rejection
  • Deep down unconsciously believe people don’t care about what you have to say
    • Could be a sense of self-righteousness
    • Protecting yourself – you’re not going to believe me anyway
    • Don’t believe people will listen so don’t give them time or attention
  • Becoming aware and catching yourself in the act
    • You typically catch yourself after the act
    • Then you catch yourself in the act
    • Then you can get ahead of it and predict when it will happen
    • Eventually, you won’t have to prove this old belief is still true
    • It might be a struggle to let go of that belief 
    • Don’t try to change it, try to catch yourself in the act and be honest with yourself
  • Is it really disinterest or is that just what you think?
    • You may not genuinely enjoy mundane conversations or small talk
    • Not enjoying small talk has nothing to do with rejection
  • Eliminating the tendency to feel rejection
    • When you don’t have the drive toward rejection then you are using small talk to opt-out


Certification at ICF

Your Achilles Eel: The Hidden Cause of Self-Sabotage